The DL Chronicles are provocative and unique stories about men on the "dl". This isn't your regular, trite DL plotline of gay/bisexual men having a girlfriend/wife. The stories are much more complex, introspective and thought-provoking. The writing is powerful, the acting sincere and the production is high caliber, which will definitely open the doors for more black LGBT projects. If you haven't seen it, it's a must.

Watching the show made me reflect on the many men I have met on the "DL": isolated, lonely and trapped in their own psychodrama. Actually, most of them did not have girlfriends/wives; they just lived a life of paranoid secrecy.

Years ago, I met one guy who was deeply involved in the church and on the “DL”. We never dated -- church queens are an absolute no-no for me! He was someone I met through a friend and we would have these exhausting conversations about religion and sexuality. He was in his early forties, born and raised in the church, and refused to leave it. Our conversations were extremely polarizing due to the fact he had no knowledge of any other religion outside of Christianity. Everyone was going to hell if they didn't believe what he believed.

Through all of this babble there was that blaring fact he was a homo. He was fairly masculine and could easily fall under the gay radar. He didn't know what to do. He had no attraction to women and desperately wanted to be with a man, however, he felt like he was going to hell for being gay. Of course he had dated several men on and off, most of whom he met at church. Completely delusional, he felt believing he will burn in hell for being gay had no affect on his relationships with men. He just thought all gay men were terrible people because they were living a life of sin — basically his self-hating spirit was angry that he couldn’t find companionship.

His light and inspiration was his mid-teen nephew. He would go on and on about what he and his nephew would do, how his nephew would stay the night at his house and how he was such a good mentor to him…it was the Godly thing to do. For some reason, every time he mentioned his nephew a blazing red flag would go up inside of me. There was something about his tone whenever he spoke of this precious mid-teen boy that made me uncomfortable.

In our last conversation, on a whim, wondering if I was crossing his boundary, I went with an instinct and softly asked, “Have you ever…touched your nephew?”

“Why would you ask me that?” he replied.

“Well, I just wanted to know because…I don’t know…you talk about him so much...” He began with, “Well, I’ve never told anyone this before…” The horror story began…

He explained “one time” when his nephew stayed the night over his house he did “touch” him. He wouldn't say exactly what he did, but he stressed it was inappropriate. He didn’t know why he did it. He promised he would never do it again. He even said he had an idea that his nephew was not heterosexual.

Out of guilt he told his nephew’s mother, which was his sister-in-law...a good Christian woman. He explained he was scared how she would react, but wanted to be honest and claimed he was ready for anything she decided to do, from calling the police to disowning him. Her response was…anything her child suffered as a result of being “touched” by his Uncle will be healed through the power of prayer and Jesus. In addition, his sin of homosexuality can be healed through God. No police reported filed, no counseling and not even a talk with the child…God would take care of it.

I was disgusted. I never spoke to the person again. I understood, which took a lot in me to do, when people are sexually repressed they will act out in dangerous and healthy ways…for example, the pedophiles in the Catholic Church. On the other hand, regardless of repression, he was a pedophile. At some point you must take responsibility for your actions, especially as an adult in your forties. Bringing innocent children into your own madness gets no sympathy. His sister-in-law should’ve been ashamed of herself to think sexual abuse could be healed through prayer, which makes her just as much of a predator. The nephew still went over his Uncle’s house, but he claimed he never touched the child again...who knows how true that is.

All gay men are NOT pedophiles and all men on the DL are NOT pedophiles. This is another story of what happens when people repress themselves. I do believe if he wasn’t living such a suffocating life he wouldn’t have acted out with a child. Regardless, an innocent child was damaged, who more than likely is a full grown adult now and no one took any accountability. Is the child who is now a man also living a life on the DL?

We never spoke again. I had never been to his place and wasn't even sure if the name he gave me was his real name. Sadly, these DL stories sometimes mutate into horror stories…how long can you live a life of shame without eventually shaming other people?

Labels: Sexuality, STORYTELLING