CLAY CANE // GET YOUR LIFE

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Hold onto your gilda! You are about to watch one of the greatest vocal performances in R&B history. I loved this woman and the song -- she won a Grammy, but never released a second album. Supposedly, she did not want to be a soloist artist and preferred back-up for Luther Vandross, Tina Turner and the Rolling Stones. Notice how that whistle high note sounds crisper than Mariah's. The last two minutes are ungodly...

Labels: Old School

Posted by Clay :: 3:15 PM :: 12 comments

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Monday, September 29, 2008

Bill Maher: Welfare Queens

It doesn't get better than Bill Maher's commentary...

Labels: Politics

Posted by Clay :: 11:51 AM :: 6 comments

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Friday, September 26, 2008

Jennifer Hudson interview on Advocate.com

This is my second time around interviewing Jennifer Hudson. The first time was in 2006 for Dreamgirls. I remembered her as humble, sincere, and almost a bit shy. I was wondering if that would change now that she is a bonafied mega star and one of four black women to win an Oscar. Fortunately, J-Hud was exactly the same way this time around.

Check out my interview wih her for Advocate.com. Her self-titled debut album is in stores Tuesday.

Jennifer Hudson Takes Back Her Spotlight

Labels: Jennifer Hudson

Posted by Clay :: 5:32 PM :: 1 comments

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In these scary times, I truly think we need some church...

Posted by Clay :: 10:59 AM :: 4 comments

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Thursday, September 25, 2008

Johnny McDevil

This is why I never paid attention to politics. You learn of these terrible things and there is little you can do about it. Is anyone having this eerie feeling? The times just feel unsafe and the more slick stunts I see from the Republicans it horrifies me for November 4th.

At this point, if McCain can have a VP candidate who doesn't know what the "Bush doctrine" is, if McCain can demand that debates be postponed, and now "suspend" his campaign -- knowing that if Obama did any of this he would be hung by a tree by Democrats and Republicans -- anything can happen. November 4th? The way America is right now, there is no way we should lose, but considering the stunts that Republicans pull with no one questioning it... I don't know. I'm not sure how true this, but just in case, follow the rules below:

Please, please, please advise everyone you know that they absolutely can NOT go to the polls wearing any Obama (or whoever you are voting for) shirts, pins, hats, etc. It is AGAINST THE LAW and will be grounds to have the polling officials to turn you away.

This is considered campaigning and no one can campaign within X amount of feet of the polls. They are banking on us being overly excited and not being aware of this long standing law that you can bet will be ENFORCED THIS YEAR! They are banking that if you are turned away, you will not go home and change your clothes and return to the polls to vote. Please just don't wear ANY gear of any sorts to the polls!

Please share this information with as many people as you can. If you are already aware of this, please don't take it as insulting your intelligence. See you at the polls on November 4th.

Also, tonight CHRIS ROCK WILL BE ON LARRY KING LIVE. Now you know that will be a cackle. Please watch the video below about McCain... I haven't been this scared since Saw II!

Labels: Politics

Posted by Clay :: 10:50 AM :: 12 comments

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Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Chris Rock Chops Up Bill Clinton

Tell it like it is Chris!

Labels: Politics

Posted by Clay :: 11:35 AM :: 6 comments

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Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Best BFFs

The cherished black best friend. This is a legendary figure in Hollywood that once was a mammy (Gone with the Wind), then became a maid (Imitation of Life), and soon emerged as the savior for the main character —AKA a token of diversity. Sometimes the black best friend is unknown actress on their grind. On the other hand, the black best friend is A-list by black film standards, but D-list by all other standards. Check out some of the greatest black best friends…

10. Viola Davis as Jean in Nights in Rodanthe (2008)

Viola has been working in Hollywood for over ten years and you can currently see her as Diane Lane’s best friend forever in the romantic comedy Nights in Rodanthe. In the previews Diane Lane cries, “You are my best friend!”

9. A.J. Johnson as Shauna in Dying Young (1993)

A.J. Johnson was Julia Roberts gal pal in the cancer tear jerker Dying Young. By 1991, Johnson was famous among black folks for her role in House Party, but in Dying Young she was regulated to a tiny role that included consoling Roberts and of course some dancing scenes at a club. By the second half of the film, Johnson’s character disappeared completely.

8. Kasi Lemmons as Ardelia in Silence of the Lambs (1991)

Lemmons’ character was supposedly Jodie Foster’s closest friend and roommate in the Oscar-winning Silence of the Lambs. After a jogging scene and a chat with Clarice, Ardelia vanished from the film. What happened? Did Buffalo Bill kill her off in the deleted scenes?

7. Elise Neal as Hallie McDaniel in Scream 2 (1997)

Hallie McDaniel? Sounds a lil’ too close to Hattie McDaniel! Hallie was Sidney Prescott’s best friend in the Scream sequel. As soon as we saw her in the film, we all knew she would be killed off and she certainly was. In all fairness, everyone around Sidney was killed off... but the film did murder Omar Epps and Jada Pinkett in the first ten minutes.

6. Rosie Perez as Cindy in Untamed Heart (1993)

By 1993 Rosie Perez was the most popular Latina actress in the world; she had big roles in Spike Lee’s Do The Right Thing and 1992's White Men Can’t Jump. Still, next to Marisa Tomei and Christian Slater, Perez was just the sassy Latina with an extra thick accent and working as a waitress.

5. Nia Long as Donna in Stigmata (1999)

Nia Long was practically a legend in the black community by 1999, staring in classics like Boyz 'N The Hood, Friday, and Love Jones. However, next to Patricia Arquette in the horror film Stigmata, Long was the concerned sistah gurl. I remember thinking, “Isn’t Nia Long bigger than Patricia Arquette?” I was wrong...

4. Morgan Freeman as Hoke in Driving Miss Daisy (1989)

Hoke is a legend in the history of black best friends in cinematic history. He suffered the abuse of Jessica Tandy’s racist character, Daisy, and answered everything with “Yes Miss Daisy!” By the end, Daisy cried, “You are my best friend.” Awww, racism allowed her to accept the field hand in the house.

3. Stacy Dash as Dionne in Clueless (1995)

Dionne as Cher’s sidekick in Clueless is one of the better black best friends. Dionne was a fully developed character and had scenes throughout the entire film. Cher never cried on Dionne’s shoulder and Dionne never had to save the day. Sometimes Hollywood gets it right.

2. Jennifer Hudson as Louise in Sex & the City (2008)

By all means Hudson is A-list in the black community and even an Oscar-winner. However, when she became the black best friend in Sex & the City those credentials were useless. As Louise, she was a southern, living beyond her means, and looking for love. In the end, she became “Saint Louise” saving Carrie Bradshaw’s life—as Rockacandy.com said, she is the magical Negro.

1. Regina King: A Cinderella Story (2004)/Miss Congeniality 2: Armed & Fabulous (2005)/Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde (2003)

In my opinion, Regina King is a lead but don’t tell Hollywood that. King goes down as a legendary black best friend for Reese Witherspoon, Sandra Bullock, and Hillary Duff. King is always a shoulder to cry on, has a miracle to make and drops words of sistah girl wisdom. Say you want, Regina stays working!

Honorable mentions: Brandy in I Know What I Did Last Summer (1988), Rachelle True in The Craft (1996), Alfre Woodard in Extremities (1986), Mykelti Williamson in Forest Gump (1994)

Labels: Race

Posted by Clay :: 12:00 AM :: 6 comments

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Monday, September 22, 2008

Are Black Folks Crying a River?

Written by John Walker

John Walker is a previous guest writer who wrote Did Latinos Betray Blacks? and Is Obama Too Black? In this provocative opinion piece Walker questions the state of Black Americans, our social accountability and what exactly does Sen. Barack Obama represent as a potential president. Again, I do not agree with everything he says, but it's an interesting perspective.

***

I'm beginning to understand, to my horror, that we are in fact a people not yet ready for freedom. Nobody respects a fool, not even other fools.

The more this election rolls on the more I understand why black people are in the shape that we are in. As a people we are so naïve, not just about issues of race, but about daily survival. Collectively and individually, too many black people look like the "deer caught in headlights"—my heart is heavy about it. Sometimes I use harsh and provocative language to cover up my sincere sadness over a people, my people, who are silly beyond words. I grieve for my people.

The conservatives and so-called "white" swing voters don't just dislike Sen. Barack Obama, more importantly; they hate your black ass. Seeing those black delegates at the Democratic National Convention on primetime TV, smiling and crying with tears of joy is what makes them hate. We are so grateful for this moment in history, but not considering are dire, freedomless circumstances.

Statistics and my own life experience bares witness of a people who are poverty-stricken, sickly, in debt, and are not able to see themselves within the context of a hostile environment because they perceive no threat. When I say threat, I'm not talking about white mob attacks, but the vulnerability of health, food, shelter and clothing (and not your Gucci rag/bag)… think every hurricane season in Louisiana and Texas.

Even if we go to college, rack up on degrees, we're still winding up in debt and at risk to life's challenges. Black people always seem to be taken by surprise and then cry "Lawd, Jesus help me!", which isn't a testimony of faith, but instead the braying of an ass.

Why do we spend more than we have and then wonder why we are broke? Literally, check-to-check and thinking that living in such a vulnerable state is security,

having no concept that your bills should total no more than 60% of your gross income —particularly if we're trying to gain financial stability.

Why do we think that we can be overweight and not get sick? Then have the audacity to be shocked when stroke, diabetes and heart attack come a-knockin'?

Why do we think we can act with no discretion within our sex lives and NOT contract HIV/AIDS?

I'm sorry to say all despair is not tragedy; some of this sh*t is earned. When I stumble, the most sobering and empowering thing I can do for myself is acknowledge my own contribution to my circumstance and then correct it. To understand that the heavens didn't conspire against me, but instead I've been unjust to myself.

We are a people in a state of disrepair, expecting positive output from ill-conceived inputs "in the name of Jesus."

That legacy plagues us to this very hour. We were not nor do we raise our children to compete. No wonder, for all the wrong reasons, most of us think we need a Barack Obama win...like showing a Negro child they can be somebody —just stupid.

John Walker is a guest writer for ClayCane.net. This is an opinion piece and does not necessarily reflect the views of Clay Cane.

Labels: Politics, Race

Posted by Clay :: 12:00 AM :: 38 comments

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Friday, September 19, 2008

Movie Review: Lakeview Terrace

Summary: Angry black man is bitter about the interracial love fest that just moved next door to him. However, this angry black man is a crooked, widowed cop who wants a "chocolate drop" of his own—sort of like Training Day meets Single White Female. Yes, "chocolate drop" is actually used in this film!

Review: Samuel L. Jackson is the hardest working man in Hollywood. He is always enjoyable on screen, whether it's bad movies like Snakes on a Plane or legendary films like Time to Kill—the man performs no matter what the role. So it makes sense that Jackson is the only person who could make the role of Abel Turner in Lakeview Terrace, which is theatres today, enjoyable. Mr. Turner is twitching in repressed black rage every time he sees Lisa Mattson, played by Kerry Washington, get some love by her big ole strapping, blonde and blue white husband. Lawd knows, this is the type of image of a black man Barack Obama is trying to take out of the mind of voters.

Lakeview Terrace isn't terribly bad, but it's far from a chilling thriller. The scenarios are humdrum and don’t conjure the likes of true "someone is invading our home” thrillers. For example, Abel is "terrorizing" his neighbors with bright security lights—and, God forbid, the interracial couple can't sleep! This is a far cry from the The Hand That Rocks the Cradle when the mother found out the evil nanny was breastfeeding her child.

Another example, Abel has a bachelor party and manages to catch Lisa's husband on camera being forced to dance with a stripper—he puts the DVD of the stripper and her husband in Lisa's mailbox. Again, leaps and bounds away from the shock we all had when Jennifer Jason Leigh slowly walked down the staircase of the salon in the same haircut, make-up, and outfit as Bridget Fonda in Single White Female. All of the oohs and ahhs were lackluster and weren't even worthy of a "no he didn't!"

This is a “racial” thriller and the handling of our country's greatest sin is often times uncomfortable. The racist jabs are oddly placed and solely directed toward Washington's white husband. Lisa's father is racist to him, the neighbor is racist, and he mentions several times how he gets so much "shit" from black men for having a black wife. In the mind of the writers, David Loughery and Howard Korder, who happen to be white, it's as if white people just gave up on racism and transferred it to black folks.

Furthermore, while I don't know every black man on the planet, I have never met a black man who truly cared that another black woman was with a white man. Reason being, there isn't a shortage of black women for black men. Now, a black woman mad at a brotha for marrying Mrs. Whitey—that might've been a hot movie! An angry, single black woman who had just about enough of seeing her menz being taken by Mrs. Blue Eyes (hell, add a black gay couple in the neighborhood to make her even angrier)—she goes in a Fatal Attraction rage to take back her brothas! "I won't be ignored, Daquan!" Well, that would still be socially problematic. Still, I see Sherri Shepard in the starring role!

Whatever the case, Lakeview Terrace was such a weak film that it's hard to get offended. Fortunately, there are strong performances from every actor. Even though the movie is littered with uninspiring twists; the plot is one solid storyline and told smoothly. Lastly, Samuel L. Jackson's delivery as racist, angry blackey is fun to watch for 86 minutes.

Grade: C

Lakeview Terrace is in theaters today.

Labels: MOVIE REVIEWS

Posted by Clay :: 12:00 AM :: 5 comments

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Thursday, September 18, 2008

Palin Praying the Gay Away

The Stevie Nicks line wore me out...

Labels: Politics

Posted by Clay :: 10:32 AM :: 4 comments

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Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Gay Bar is Shelter After Hurricane Ike

Leave it to the gays to make the absolute best out of a horrendous situation!

While the residents of Galveston, Texas were told to flee because Ike was about to start rolling down the river—Robert's Lafitte, the local homo bar, ignored the warning and decided to have a "a pre-curfew drag show and Tina Turner sing-along."

However, after three feet of water poured into the establishment and the windows blew out, the sequin dresses and Nutbush wigs had to be shelved for one night only. Big Mouth Robert, the bar owner, said after quick mop-up the next morning they had to reopen,”All of our customers kind of demanded it. It's their bar and they kind of dictate what's going on. We're survivors."

Yes Lawd, the gays know how to survive, including Dixie Monroe, a transgender barmaid "who wore a tiger-print cowboy hat and a low-cut top." Miss Dixie said, "You can see there's not too much worry and stress on people's faces." Straight, gay, whatever, packed in the bar, which is now "setting out food donated by locals for people in need." A straight restaurant worker who never visited the bar before said, "It's more than a life saver. This is like the Coast Guard."

Tina Turner remains “the artist of choice.” Why? You guessed it—"given that she survived another Ike -- her abusive husband Ike Turner."

Don't you just love this story? Funny thing is, if a bunch of drags, lesbians, gay men, and transgenders trekked to a redneck bar for refuge -- I am sure they would quickly be turned away and threatened to be lynched. The gays are forgiving people.

Click here for full story.

Special thanks to my dear friend for sending me this story!

Labels: Sexuality

Posted by Clay :: 12:00 AM :: 6 comments

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Tuesday, September 16, 2008

This Day in Music: Mariah's Butterfly

Damn, I feel like I've mentioned Mariah too much recently... once a month is enough. However, I couldn't pass up to write about the release of 1997's Butterfly, which came out eleven years ago today -- September 16th, 1997. This album marks a turning point of classic Mariah and eternally a pre-teen but dressing like a scallywag Mariah.

I vividly remember when Butterfly was released, it had been two years since her last album (1995's Daydream) and everyone was anticipating this "new" Mariah. She was officially emancipated from Tommy Mottola, stripping down to a bikini in the “Honey” video and supposedly going a more urban, soulful route. While I always felt Mariah had soul, she was definitely more adult contemporary in the early to mid nineties.

Now, of course this was the days before downloading music or "accidental" leaks. An album came out and you had to wait till you bought the album to hear even one additional song outside of the first single. If you were a young'n like me you had to wait till Friday when you got paid... hell, back then you even had to stand in line at the bank to cash your check during lunch! Direct deposit was only for the elite—but I digress.

I wasn't exactly hooked on the song “Honey,” I was already bored with the Mase and Puffy blatino duo. But, one of my friends praised the Butterfly CD and he was a fan of Sade, Chante Moore, and The Brand New Heavies—he definitely had good taste.

He played "Breakdown" for me over the phone, before the days of emailing an mp3 and raved about the other songs. Within in a week of the album's release I picked up Butterfly and fell in love with every track except for "The Roof" and "Fourth of July" (don't ask me why, just didn't move me). This was clearly Mariah's best work.

However, the public didn't agree. Butterfly was praised by lovers of R&B, but alienated her pop fan base. The album sold five million, but her last two, Daydream and Musicbox, sold over ten million domestically. Still, this felt like Mariah’s most sincere and genuine work. Unfortunately, Butterfly would begin a downward spiral of short skirts, being eternally twelve, and focusing more on beats than her dynamic voice. Regardless, Butterfly is one of the greatest albums of the nineties.

The Butterfly album as a whole is branded in my memory. Shortly after the CD was released my aunt suddenly died. I would listen to “Close My Eyes” on repeat, just thinking of my aunt who was more like a second mother. “Guardian angel I, Sail away on an ocean with you by my side / Orange clouds roll by / They burn into your image and you're still alive (You're always alive).”

Here is an incredible live performance of the song—in just jeans and a T-shirt.

Labels: MARIAH

Posted by Clay :: 1:00 AM :: 10 comments

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Monday, September 15, 2008

Living All Alone

After the horrible Fashion Rocks and VMAs in the past couple weeks, I've been overloading on old school performances. I came across the clip below -- it gave me the chills. That growl at 4:13 really hits me -- she is in the zone! If you don't feel this then you need a soul transplant.

Labels: Old School

Posted by Clay :: 10:38 AM :: 27 comments

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Friday, September 12, 2008

Michelle Williams Interview in HX

Check out my interview with Michelle Williams in HX, which you can pick up anywhere in Manhattan, for their DIVA! Music Issue. Michelle talks Christianity, playing bi, and having a crush on Rihanna. Michelle's new album, Unexpected, is in stores October 7th. The full interview is pasted below.

***

Originally published in HX.

DAWN OF THE DIVA

Michelle Williams delights gay fans by discovering her dance-pop destiny

By Clay Cane

Michelle Williams has been reaching out to the gay community like Barack Obama has been reaching out to the right. The former Destiny’s Child diva has endless YouTube.com videos shouting out the gays, and there’s even a Michelle look-a-like contest, which will surely bring in the drags. She also performed during Pride weekend at NYC gay club Splash with a dance troupe of shirtless, hunky men. Yes, Miss Williams wants our support, and she’s willing to lose her breath for it!

Her upcoming album, Unexpected, is pure pop, demanding us to dance till dawn; in fact, “We Break the Dawn,” the album’s first single, gave the successful gospel artist her first #1 hit on the Billboard dance charts. In our one-on-one interview, Williams breaks down her love affair with gays, playing bi, and how to battle a Beyoncé drag queen.

What can your gay fans expect from Unexpected?

Expect just fierceness all the way through! Expect to dance—just expect Michelle Williams coming out in her own way. I’m having a ball. Expect a side of Michelle that maybe some always knew existed, and they just couldn’t wait to see it. Expect a classic album.

You, Beyoncé and Kelly have done gay press for your solo records, but despite your gay following, there wasn’t really any gay press while you were Destiny’s Child. Why didn’t you reach out to the gay community as a group?

I have no idea... I don’t have an answer for that, honestly—I’m not giving you a politically correct answer. Although we knew we had gay fans; we saw that at the shows—they were living! Some of the music, like “Lose My Breath,” we knew the queens were going to be tipping! I don’t know… Did gay press come to us or did they not feel they had to because we had addressed them already with the costumes and songs? We appreciate them. There are times I’ve gone on YouTube and I’ve seen drag queens as Destiny’s Child or Beyoncé. We definitely feel that love. I think that’s why individually we can give that love back because we didn’t get a chance to do that as a group.

Who’s the first gay person you met in your life?

When I was younger—this is so typical and cliché, but—it was the choir director at my grandmother’s church. I probably shouldn’t have said that because I don’t know if he was really open with it. [Laughs]

Well, you had a sense!

Yeah! I had a sense as a child—you know, something was different! [Laughs] Some of my closest friends are gay, the ones that keep us together, keep us in line, tell you the truth. I have a straight male best friend that tells me the truth, but there is something about a gay queen; he’s like, “I ain’t got nothing to lose, so I’m going to tell you the truth, baby! I’ve been there, done that, so what is the worst reply you can tell me that I haven’t heard?” I think that’s the toughness that comes with it.

Patti Labelle once said, “The gays will make or break your ass!” How important is it to have a gay fan base?

It’s definitely important because they are going to be loyal. They know what it’s like to stick together. I’m happy to gain that fan base, so I’m looking forward to having fun this year with this record.

Given your religious background as a Christian, how do you reconcile your religious beliefs with the gay community?

Well, the thing that shuts me up is “judge not.” We are all judged for being different, so that’s all I can say from my religious standpoint is to judge not. People can argue the Bible up and down, all day long—people have their own interpretation—but how about God is love first and foremost, and it’s important to have that relationship with God? Christ being the one, my specific one, and what my conviction is may not be your conviction, but that’s something that one has to personally work out with God. If you feel like your walk is solid, keep it moving!

What are your thoughts on gay marriage?

If that’s who you love and that’s who you want to be with, it’s not going to affect me at the end of the day. I don’t think about it, I don’t worry about it.

You played Shug Avery in the musical version of The Color Purple in Chicago. Shug was a little lesbian, a little bisexual.

She was a little of everything!

Were you at all nervous about playing a bisexual character?

If that’s all someone focused on in The Color Purple, you missed the whole story about love and overcoming things. I talked to my mother, and she said, “Baby, it’s just acting, don’t worry about people, especially in the gospel community. It’s okay; you’re going to be fine.” Shug needed some love, and she thought she was showing Celie love. Before you know it, it was something in Celie that empowered Shug as well.

If you were bi, who’d be your girl crush?

[Pauses] Lord, now they’ll be like, “She likes Rihanna!” Honey, just put Rihanna down! [Laughs]

Do you get hit on a lot by women?

I haven’t really had it direct and hard, but in their own way.

Did it make you uncomfortable?

No, I had fun—I’d flirt back!

If a Michelle drag queen had to battle a Beyoncé drag queen, what advice would you give the Michelle drag queen?

Well, since me and Beyoncé have both fallen—you should fall fabulous, honey! Roll, do the splits—and have some goldfish in your platform shoes!

Unexpected (Columbia Records/Music World Entertainment) is out Oct. 7.

Labels: Interviews

Posted by Clay :: 12:00 AM :: 8 comments

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Thursday, September 11, 2008

The Family That Preys Review?

Tyler Perry's The Family That Preys is in theatres tomorrow. Normally, I would have a review posted by midnight tomorrow. However, when I attended a screening a few weeks back all of the journalists were forced to sign an agreement/contract that they would publish no reviews until after the movie came out. I have been to tons of screenings and I have never had to sign a contract that I wouldn't review a film. Usually, the publicity department wants to see a report of all the coverage (reviews, interviews, etc.) before it comes out. You should've heard the journalists huffing and puffing!

Well, since I cannot post a review of The Family That Preys, I decided to go back in the archives and post a review of 2005's Diary of a Mad Black Woman.

***

Review: Diary of Mad Colored Folk

I don’t think my friends will ever forgive me for dragging them to see Diary of a Mad Black Woman, or as I now call it, Diary of Mad Colored Folk. I wanted to “support,” and thought it would be a fun laugh like Big Mama’s House or Deliver Us From Eva – not saying those films were brilliant, but all I wanted was a chuckle. Little did I know I was subjected to an artistic terrorist attack on American soil, which consisted of explosive bombs of bad acting/dialogue/wigs. Shemar Moore’s cornrow wig and Kimberly Elise’s “Where Do Broken Hearts Go" Whitney Houston wig– really left me in shambles!

The film was "critically acclaimed." I’m not sure which critics enjoyed it, but at the theatre I attended people were mortified, laughing at the wrong scenes, screaming at the screen, and sighing as if they were sitting through a lesson on Jesus Christ from President Bush. I had low expectations for this film, but the film went below my lowered expectations. Sure, I can see elements of this working in a play entitled: "Momma I Burnt the Fried Chicken While Getting Slayed with a Bible in My Hand," but not in a 116 minute movie.

Tyler's first film effort was of the most predictable, contrived, choppy, and unimaginative movies I have ever endured. At points, I was finishing the sentences because the dialogue was so obvious. The “keepin’ it trite” theme seemed like a marathon, which allowed me to even cue the rain as if I was the director.

One torturous point in the film is when Elise (who will need years of overacting, crocodile tears and clinched fists to make up for playing this role) said something to the effect of: “He didn’t give me sex – he gave me intimacy …” Sistah girl about two rows and to the left of us hollered, “YEAH M*THAF*CKIN’ RIGHT!”

Then, there was the fiery cross of Jim Crow Christianity that burned throughout the film. I have my issues with Christianity and black folks, but I accept that is a part of our culture for several reasons. I still found it deplorable that Tyler is marketing to the black Christian audience simply to bring in money and claim it is all in the name of God and goodness.

Isn’t this the structure of most religions? That Vatican has more money than Pepsi. God is the marketing ploy and I guess if one is enjoying “worldly” vices like movies, making Jesus the main character makes the sinners feel a lil' more saved.

The Bible quotes and religion slammed onto the audience was intense, excessive, and cheesy. Trite little ditties like: "God is a jealous God, he don't like any man put befo' him!" "Only God can save you!" "I know this isn't the Christian thing to do..." "This man is everything I want and ... he's a Christian" wore me out like a godless whore in a back alley.

My dear friend roared at the screen: “Quoting scripture stops here!” Was I watching a movie in Chelsea or the PAX channel on a Sunday afternoon? As if we as African-Americans don't already have enough divisive factors in our community -- the last thing we need is this ideology of a perfect man/woman must imitate a European state structure such as Jim Crow Christianity.

Despite religion, there wasn’t an original thought. Perry badly stole from classics like The Color Purple -- with the "sinner" storming through the church doors singing her "pure as white snow" soul out. Soulfood -- with the dinner scene that Babyface and Tracy Edmonds should sue Tyler Perry for. The end was a replica of Officer and a Gentleman. Isn’t this illegal? Aren’t there copyright laws for this?

Some say I should support a black man like Perry who got a black movie green-lighted, was homeless at one point and is making money …. Ummm just because black folks got a movie made that isn't about drugs or killing doesn't make it a good movie! Sure, I support black folks moving ahead, but if a movie is BAD – it is BAD.

My friends and I aren’t the only ones - three Jamaican gay guys behind us were swooning and nearly in tears repeatedly saying, “This is a waste of my money ... ” Another friend who saw a later show, called me after the film and said: “Clay, did you see that movie? Oh my God it was so bad – I can’t even put it into words. I was embarrassed and angry.”

Now to those reading this and happened to like the film (Lawd, in heaven!) please understand that I was not expecting an Oscar or Image Award winning film - although it will probably win an Image Award. However, I wasn't expecting a minstrel show, black-face, buffoonery overloaded with divisions between Christians and sinners overloaded into 116 minutes. If it was 1954 I would expect the NAACP to boycott this trash trunk juice of a movie!

Diary of a Mad Black Woman is currently on DVD with special features! I can only imagine what gems are hidden in there – maybe little antique white Jesus dolls directly from a 1940's black church.

Ending on a positive note, hopefully Perry will improve with time. Take some creative writing classes and focus on plots, not marketing ploys.

Labels: MOVIE REVIEWS

Posted by Clay :: 11:14 AM :: 11 comments

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Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Give 'em hell Joe!

Joe Biden telling it like it is!

Labels: Politics

Posted by Clay :: 9:00 AM :: 7 comments

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Monday, September 08, 2008

Hil. St. Soul interview on Essence

Sorry, no review of the 2008 Video Music Awards. After watching the first few minutes of Rihanna's 10,000 B.C. performance with the stage presence of a cave woman -- I couldn't take another minute.

For some real music, check out my interview with up and coming British soul duo, Hil St. Soul. The lead talks her new album, white U.K. "soul" singers and the lack of her support in her own country.

Hil St. Soul: A British Invasion

Labels: Interviews

Posted by Clay :: 10:18 AM :: 5 comments

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Friday, September 05, 2008

America's Next Top Model: One Chop!

Written by Apollonia

Apollonia is a frequent reader of ClayCane.net and a heavy contributor to the site. However, this is her first time as a guest writer. She gives an an insightful critique on Wednesday night's season premiere of America's Next Top Model: Cycle 11, which has its first transgender contestant.

I know the reviews are mixed about Isis on ANTM. None critiquing her, but more about how ANTM is handling her trans woman "story line". Nonetheless, big congratulations to Isis for remaining poised, elegant and not lowering herself to the jealous girls who can't even name a fashion designer or follow lighting.

I was particularly disturbed when all of the girls surrounded her like a monkey in a cage, asking foolish questions about her genitalia, touching her hands and hair. She took it like more of a lady than most of those girls. I'm not sure I can make it through a full season of this -- some parts were just too mean, especially the immature girls hurling insults during her photo shoot. I, and many others, see through the nod of Tyra's weave-filled head and the fake sincerity of her “smile with your eyes” face. Therefore, in the opinion piece below, Apollonia delivers an excellent critique on Isis, Tyra and ANTM.

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Over the past 10 seasons, America’s Next Top Model has been degenerating slowly and becoming virtually unwatchable. Season into season, Tyra Banks has effectively exploited various topics for her bottom line. In her, “I care about you, give me a hug” vein, she has had these girls expose their demons and diseases—lupus, anorexia, and autism. But hey, it’s all in the name of "fierceness". In “TyraWorld” we are all FIERCE—do your walk girl and bring mama some ratings!

Since I heard a transgender woman by the name of Isis would be on cycle 11, alarms immediately went off in my head. I just knew that this was going to be another "Tyraploitation" moment, "Look at me, I am putting a transgender woman in my modeling competition. Oh pioneers!" Tyra, cut the bullshit. You are hardly a pioneer, maybe the first three seasons were “groundbreaking” by reality television standards, but you’ve lost your way. In my opinion, a transgender woman on ANTM is only groundbreaking if she takes the grand prize. Also, are the judges going to use their usual and offensive “tranny jabs” this season? Will they tell Isis her photos are “too tranny” or the famous “dragalicious” as were prescribed to Jade from cycle? I loved Jade and her malapropisms, but, I digress...

After watching the first episode of cycle 11, the flame was lit in my tampon! Before we try to relieve Tyra of responsibility, she is an Executive Producer who reviews every edit so she is responsible for what aired last night.

What struck me the most were the comments those shady girls were throwing at Isis. Clark, calling her a man and talking about her proper “Southern upbringing”—seriously, why Tyra? It’s hard enough to be a transgender woman in our society, why would Tyra think this is groundbreaking if it’s the same old story?

Then there were the rants about what Isis has between her legs. In one scene, a pack of girls were standing around her like a scene from Mean Girls, treating her like a science experiment, bombarding her with questions. Will ANTM spend an entire season obsessing about the penis? Isis of course was graceful and told them about the wonders of tape. Category closed, bitches and yes I wore the bathing suit! Sounds lik

e a cheap ratings ploy to me.

In my humble opinion they should have saved that for the last episode. “Yeah, Isis went through the entire season, and y’all never knew.” Now that’s good television!

Isis has been graceful and waterproof thus far, a credit to her when she should be knocking some of those heifers. I appreciated one of the girls calling her a butterfly—but if the others contestants are going to continue to be disrespectful -- I hope she at least has one moment where she lays in.

I understand that not everyone loves a tranny the way I do. I consider them brave and beautiful. I think it takes an extremely strong and resilient character to recognize that you were born in the wrong body and go about changing that. It’s about living life on your own terms. I don’t believe that Tyra is truly respecting that.

Even when discussing Isis’ photograph, where she held a ballot to her breast, Tyra had to make an aside about her “secret.” Well, doll baby, it isn’t a secret. If you really believe in her right to exist and her place in the competition—stop bringing it up. See, that is my essential problem. Isis lives as a woman, her being a contestant on ANTM should be with the understanding that she is accepted as a woman. Therefore, treat her as one and quit playing the transgender card.

So one chop to America's Next Top Model!

Labels: Transgender, Tyra Banks

Posted by Clay :: 12:00 AM :: 11 comments

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Thursday, September 04, 2008

Throwback: Starring Expose

Freestyle rarely made it out of the barrios of New York City, but with groups like Sweet Sensation, Lisa Lisa and the Cult Jam, and Expose -- freestyle managed to rock the Billboard Hot 100 and R&B charts in the late eighteties and early nineties. One of the biggest groups of the freestyle era was the girl group Expose.

If you thought Destiny's Child had drama, between the group's first single in 1985 and their debut album in 1987, Expose already went three group members. Finally settling on three memebers, Jeanette Jurado, Gioia Carmen Bruno, and Ann Curless released Exposure, their debut album, in 1987 on Arista Records. The album went double-plantium, spawning four top ten Billboard Hot 100 hits and three hits on the R&B charts. Exposure would go down in history as one of the most successful dance albums of all time. More drama ensued when the ladies of Expose were being cheated by their record label, only making $200 per show. Renegotiations for their contract were made and they were sent to work on their sophmore album.

In 1989 the group released What You Don't Know, which went Gold. The hits from their second album made histoy according to Wikipedia, "when they became the first girl group to have 7 back-to-back Top 10 hits on the Billboard Hot 100." Sadly, the group took a sudden turn when Gioia Carmen Bruno developed a tumor on her vocal chords and couldn't sing for many years. She was replaced for the 1992 album, Expose, which was when sales slumped, even with Clive Davis as Executive Producer.

By 1995 Expose was dropped from Arista. In 2006 the group reunited for a tour and continued to work together for freestyle concets amd gay pride festivals...Lawd knows the gays will keep you working.

Check out their greatest hits..

"Seasons Change" was their only #1 hit in 1988. A good ballad from a dance group was always a guarranted hit for these freestyle groups.

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"Come Go With Me" charted at #5 on theBillboard Hot 100 and their biggest hit on the R&B charts, peaking at #14. The video is pure eighties madness!

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"Point of No Return" is their debut single and my favorite Expose song. The girls gave a great performance at the Apollo -- spandex, stretch pants and all. Check out the clip below.

Labels: Old School

Posted by Clay :: 10:30 AM :: 4 comments

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Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Is it "black" or "Black"?

I have always been taught to not capitalize black when referring to race. However, recently, when I have submitted finished stories to publications, after it's printed "Black" is capitalized. Usually, white remains in lower case.

Is this some type of grammatical protest that I know nothing about? In college, all of my teachers, especially my African-American Studies teachers, would take a beefy percentage out of my paper if "black" was capitalized. Reason being, according to them, is you only capitalize proper names of races. When you are referring to groups of races, black and white, both should not be capitalized. As this site says, "Capitalize the proper names of nationalities, races, tribes, etc.: French, Caucasian, Mataponi, Zulu. However, lowercase black, white."

I’ve noticed this capitalization of "black" on web sites from bloggers to respected publications. The only time I have considered capitalizing black is when using the term “Black American”. What confuses me even more is if you capitalize black then don’t you have to capitalize white?

This is just one of many examples of how race is in illogical concept and only works in America. For black Americans, “race” is all we have. We don’t have a nationality, ethnicity, religion, or language. Therefore, we cling to the flimsy construct of race. When leaving the U.S., many of the brownest people I've seen don’t identify as black. Yes, even when it comes to grammar, the idea of race falls apart.

Labels: Race

Posted by Clay :: 8:25 AM :: 9 comments

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Tuesday, September 02, 2008

Top Ten Palin Foolishness

Before I get to Palin, CNN had poor Anderson Cooper in the heart of Hurricane Gustav this weekend! He is way too delicate to be ravaged by a big 'ole thing called Gustav. They should've thrown Soledad O'Brien out there -- Gustav needs to whoop that ass for that horrible Black in America special!

This weekend, I was inundated with glowing press on the Alaska Governor, Sarah Palin. It’s shocking that people are turning the most irrelevant things into experience while ignoring her hypocrisy, extreme lack of experience, and a cheap ploy to appeal to Sen. Clinton voters…some who are so delusional that they might actually fall for it.

Here are the top ten...

10. Johnny Get Your Gun McCain only met Palin one to two times before deeming her his VP. Is that all it takes to make a major decision for the country? Imagine if we get another terrorist attack!

9. Palin doesn't know what a VP does and asks, "What is it exactly a VP does everyday?" The journalist reassured her with, "It's a pretty big job!" Lawd have Jim Crow mercy...

8. Palin is a "supporter of abstinence-only education and opposes sex education program", but her teenage daughter is knocked up and unmarried like Becky Conner from Roseanne! Maybe if her heat-seeking daughter knew how to use a condom she wouldn't be another teenage pregnancy statistic.

7. Palin’s daughter’s baby daddy proclaims on his MySpace page, “I'm a ****ing redneck.” Also, "Ya **** with me I'll kick a** ." That isn’t very Christian now is it? His page also says he doesn’t want any kids. I wonder how it feels to be a teen daddy?

6. Pro-life, pro-gun, pro-drilling, anti-gay—haven’t we already been down this epic road? Mind you, Palin’s husband has a DUI charge on his record. Is her family pro driving while intoxicated too?

5. According to KTUU 2 NBC Anchorage, "Federal health officials say there were more than one million cases of Chlamydia reported in the U.S. last year, a record high for a single year." STDs are on the rise in Alaska and Palin is admittedly opposed to sex education. Hopefully she will lower the price of prescriptions for chlamydia, gonorrhea, and syphilis.

4. Alaska is littered with corruption—the state has had nine public corruption indictments in the last two years—and Palin might be number 10! She is already under investigation, after only 18 months as Governor of Alaska, for "potential abuse of power for firing the Public Safety Commissioner Walt Monegan for not removing Palin’s ex-brother-in-law from the police force."

3. "Palin has the same experience as Obama!" Ummm, she ran a state with just over a population of 600,000 and mayor of a town with a population of 8,000. This is far from comparable experience, but the more bizarre pundits say it the more people believe it.

2. "She has foreign policy experience because Alaska is near Russia!" Yes, someone on CNN said something to this effect this weekend. Now, I've heard of "spin", but this is more spin than a Tyler Perry movie preview!

1. "She is a working mom -- that should account for something!" When I heard a woman on CNN say this, it really got to me. Being a working mom qualifies you to be vice president? Is this an episode of Oprah or the vice president slot? If Obama's supporters ever said, "He is a black man in America—that should account for something!" The media would pounce like R. Kelly at Chuck E. Cheese!

The scary thing is some of these rants might actually work. Palin isn’t nearly as dangerous and hypocritical as Bush and he did two terms.

Labels: Politics

Posted by Clay :: 9:50 AM :: 13 comments

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